I wanted to start by saying hello to you out there in internet land. Without wanting to be too self effacing, this is a bit of background about me. I am 32 years old and live in the UK, my life is nothing particularly special in many respects; I work a 9 - 5 job and live in a fairly nice neighbourhood, I have no kids, no car (although that is a temporary glitch), I am a graduate of English language, enjoy travelling and exploring new places across the globe (well used to as money is proving to constipate my plans right now!)
But one aspect of my life was very different 6 years ago, I was morbidly obese. Yup, over 50% of my body was pure blubber. I am pretty sure I was not far off being pre diabetic and my large mass was becoming cumbersome and labourious to carry. I suffered the woes that many a fat person falls foul of; chafing, high blood pressure, stretch marks, sore joints, unreasonable sweating episodes, suffering the insults and comments that the more ignorant of society decided to throw at me. This list goes on. For a 28 year old, it was all rather unnecessary. I will hold my hands up willingly and admit that I was fully culpable for my weight problem. Gorging on unhealthy food, complete inactivity and laziness all attributed to a potentially dangerous health condition.
Before I starting dredging up some rather poignant memories of my fat days, I wanted to tell you where I am currently. I am a much healthier 145 pounds (10 stone 4 pounds or 66 kg's). I have lost 156 pounds and 82 inches off my body. I did not seek assistance from any medical or health professional and managed to turn a potentially deadly situation around. At my heaviest I weighed in at poundage a sumo wrestler would have been proud of....drum roll please... 301 pounds (21 stones or 136kg's)
Before and After
I wanted to post a picture of me near my highest weight (I will post this in pounds, kg's and stones to cover off all eventualities with conversions :) ) and a comparison picture now (please see above!) I don't have many pictures of when I was big, something I am sure that others who are gravitationally challenged can sympathise with. The fat image was quite hard to post and this is, categorically, one of the only fat images of me in existence ! I did an amazing job of hiding from the camera.
When that picture was taken, I was roughly 268 pounds which is 19 stones or 121kgs and I was already starting to work on my weight loss.
The picture was taken in Rome and I remember the intense heat and profuse sweating I experienced as I lugged my extra person's worth of weight around.
Moving on
They say that everyone has a story to tell, a good book inside of them. I think that mine would have to be my battle with the bulge. I don’t even know where to start really, recently I have been noticing the increasing number of programmes on TV about weight loss, whether it be The Biggest Loser (exercise gone mad and not a training method I would recommend), You Are What You Eat (Gillian McKeith being condescending and patronising to overweight people), Fat Families (an equally patronising presenter encouraging rather unconvinced fat people that they should change their ways.) Just a point, I apologise to any of my International reading compedres who might not be familiar with those UK programmes. I am sure you have alternatives in your own countries!
So watching these programmes has got me thinking about my own history with weight. Since I lost the bulk of the excess, I have tended not to think so much about what I went through. As each day passes the memories fade deeper into my mind although they will never fully disappear. They are ear marked back there as a reminder of what my body has gone through. Without wanting to sound too clichéd or cheesy, I really did fight a battle to get to where I am today. I have probably broken every rule in the book at some point or another, whether it be dabbling with the starts of anorexia, bulimia, obsessive exercise….I hate to say it but I have really been there and done it in many respects when it comes to fighting fat! But I have learned some very important lessons and really gained a unique insight into the trials and tribulations that weight loss can inflict.
Growing up I was not an especially large girl, sure I carried a bit of extra weight, especially in my pubescent years but there is nothing particular unusual about that. Puppy fat right? I cannot pinpoint where things changed but my weight began to fluctuate wildly as I moved into my 20’s. Let’s put it this way, I started the new Millenium at 140 pounds and, as of New Year’s Eve 2004, I was a gut busting 301 pounds! Crazy eh. I basically acquired myself a whole extra person (and a large one at that) over a 4 year period. Looking back, this was a rather impressive feat and I dread to think how many calories I must have consumed during those 4 years. If you look at it a different way, I was carrying an extra person around with me everywhere I went. Now it would be the equivalent of me giving an average weighted 5’5” woman a piggy back all day long. Blimey that would be rather tiring! That just goes to show what pressure I was putting my heart and muscoskeletal frame under.
I do have moments of poignancy where I think back to how I was feeling this time 6 years ago. I was a very different person back then, a quieter, meeker, more self conscious version of me. My mind was constantly preoccupied with thoughts about how I was going to cover my fat bits up; my large belly, generous behind and fat arms. I would wear cardigans/ jumpers around my waist, wear heavy and baggy jackets (even in the summer!), loose, baggy trousers…my mind was so preoccupied with covering my body and clocking people’s reaction to me as I walked in the street. I recall there were times when I would make excuses to not even go out anywhere because I could not face the prospect of being ridiculed or scrutinised for how I looked. How sad eh? Being paranoid is tiring work! Ironically enough some bigger people who try to disguise their bodies with shapeless clothes actually, inadvertently, draw attention to themselves. I don’t want you to think that I was being totally harranged and abused verbally all the time, that was far from the case. But people’s facial expression and reactions can shout louder than their voices ever could. I became a virtual recluse at times, afraid that society would reject me just because of how I looked. I know that it should not work that way, no one has the right to ridicule or berate another person for the way they look. I venemhently despise that to this day.
Our awareness of obesity is far greater now, it is estimated that a quarter of the British population are considered to be obese. Quite an incredible statistic really, we are not that far behind our US cousins in terms of the emerging weight crisis.
I think I will leave it at that point for now but thank you for reading my diatribe. I look foward to posting again. This is just a bit about me and a gentle intro to what could end up being quite an epic but cathartic memoir of my fat days.
Ta ta!
6 comments:
How long did it take you to lose the weight? And thanks for sharing your story and being honest about everything. It is very motivating.
Hello there, it took me 18 months to lose 150 pounds although I lost a lot in the first six months(as you would expect). The weight loss slows down as you get smaller but it was consitent apart from a couple of short plateaus.
I put that down to the exercise totally, I cannot vouch for that enough
L x
Thanks for the response. How long and how often did you exercise in the beginning? And what kind of exercises did you do? Has your routine changed a lot from then (when you first started) until now? I imagine it would.
I started with light gym work and walking, often about 1 hour a day. I would train 6 times a week, quite a lot but I realised how crucial moving my body would be not only to strengthen it but to lose the fat. it was not easy initially, I was so heavy it had to be gentle as the joints needed protection. As the weight came off the walks got longer and, as my cardiovascular fitness improved, I was able to work harder.
I mainly did walking, rowing, cycling and cross training.
When I got to 154 pounds I started running and did not stop after that. I generally exercise about 6 days a week, I love it to much. I can do a lot now and have done some running races, marathon walks and weight work.
Rainy< what diet plan did you use?
JS
Hi JS, I did not really use any specific plan rather I adapted my diet to be a)lower in fat b) lower in calories c) cut out as much sugar as I could.
I am shortly going to be posting about how I did it so hopefully that will answer your question more fully :) x
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